Hi, just looked at your work and here are my thoughts, feel free to totally ignore!
Gap… is this just a play on the word gap? Feels a little easy to be honest and can’t think how you’d expand the idea. Like the simple thinking but not doing it for me.
Shockwaves… sure I’ve seen hair/animals before but the thought is interesting and something you could have fun with. What about having beautiful models with crazy hair, could be in wildlife situations, an ambient of a caged in a zoo…
Give Blood… not good. Growing on trees is one of advertising clichés along with floating things for a ‘light’ product. Cows being milked and blood, see what you are doing but I’d either start again as it’s a really good product for the book if you crack it. How about the fact it ‘doesn’t cost you anything to donate’…
Visa… shit happens is too flippant, the latest TV is kind f the same idea with the naked bloke dropped in the desert on his stag do with just his visa to get back. That is a much better thought than yours . How about exploring the fact you can use it anywhere/gets you out of any situation…
Sharpie pens… no-one gives a shit about pens and your impressions thought is another cliché.
Hob Knobs… based on a Peter Kay gag, most people will know this so will make you look unoriginal.
Rachels. Too obscure a product and boring. Sorry.
Hummer. Only rich twats will ever buy them and not due to advertising. Pointless.
Bernard Matthews. Chicken/egg cliché. Stop with the clichés!!
Mercedes. Why are they inspired by women?
Overall you have improved but not enough to get a placement at a good agency yet.
Think your problem is that you are trying to rush getting a book together and not thinking about strategies enough. Big mistake. Good luck, sure you will get there in the end.
All the views on this page represent
me. Not any agency I may work for in the future. Just me. I hope not to offend anyone so thank you for coming, I hope you enjoy your stay and visit me again soon.
22, Insomniac and self confessed chocoholic. Watches way too much tv and thats probably why shes doing what she does... Gets what she wants most of the time and isnt afraid to fight for it. She thinks about things too much and verbalises most of it (unfortunately...)
Debbie
22, but doesn't know what she is...she's still trying to figure it out herself and when she does she will get back to you...
3 comments:
Why wont you let people put comments on for the work? You may get some good feedback, a lot of criticism but it may help.
An oversight. will amend now.
Hi, just looked at your work and here are my thoughts, feel free to totally ignore!
Gap… is this just a play on the word gap? Feels a little easy to be honest and can’t think how you’d expand the idea. Like the simple thinking but not doing it for me.
Shockwaves… sure I’ve seen hair/animals before but the thought is interesting and something you could have fun with. What about having beautiful models with crazy hair, could be in wildlife situations, an ambient of a caged in a zoo…
Give Blood… not good. Growing on trees is one of advertising clichés along with floating things for a ‘light’ product. Cows being milked and blood, see what you are doing but I’d either start again as it’s a really good product for the book if you crack it.
How about the fact it ‘doesn’t cost you anything to donate’…
Visa… shit happens is too flippant, the latest TV is kind f the same idea with the naked bloke dropped in the desert on his stag do with just his visa to get back. That is a much better thought than yours . How about exploring the fact you can use it anywhere/gets you out of any situation…
Sharpie pens… no-one gives a shit about pens and your impressions thought is another cliché.
Hob Knobs… based on a Peter Kay gag, most people will know this so will make you look unoriginal.
Rachels. Too obscure a product and boring. Sorry.
Hummer. Only rich twats will ever buy them and not due to advertising. Pointless.
Bernard Matthews. Chicken/egg cliché. Stop with the clichés!!
Mercedes. Why are they inspired by women?
Overall you have improved but not enough to get a placement at a good agency yet.
Think your problem is that you are trying to rush getting a book together and not thinking about strategies enough. Big mistake. Good luck, sure you will get there in the end.
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